After three grueling months of work and pressure I return to the world of
writing. Yes, I don't have many followers but I'm stating this for future
references when I've accomplished enough.
So this is period in life for the people of my age, it must be hard to
endure, hard to persevere and hard to think ahead.
I'm 22 years old and if you are in my age range you'd get me or pretty much
what I'm trying to put through. Right now I'm not a fully matured Adult or a
Teenager. I'm something/someone stuck between sprout and a tree.
The point I'm building up to, is to talk about one of the most important life
decisions which we've already taken or been forced to take. As an Indian, a Son
and a Human I was given a buffet of options, which later, I came to know that
it was an illusion of choice. We all know what I'm talking about.
Yes, Engineering.
According to Dictionary.com the word "Engineering" Means,
1.The art or science of making practical application of the knowledge of
pure sciences, as physics or chemistry, as in the construction of
engines, bridges, buildings, mines, ships, and chemical plants.
2. The action, work, or profession of an engineer.
3. Skillful or artful contrivance; maneuvering.
But, I can assure you that the first definition applies to those who are
really into it, really really into Engineering and knowing how stuff works and
shit. All others can kiss book knowledge goodbye.
The second definition on the other hand will be subtly induced into you in
your four year journey.
The most of them won't realize it will come in handy when you're pushed into
the real world ocean with sharks.
The third definition will apply to anyone who is put through this
Engineering.
Note: I'm not trying to debase or shame Engineering, but rather to bring
what really happens in Engineering colleges that are not well established or
well known.
Every Engineer knows that he/she has to go through engineering for four years.
Four Incredibly short years.
The First year or The Initiation.
This is the year where most of your dreams emulated by movies and serials
you've seen on TV come to your mind. But the reality hits you hard in 2 weeks
of college. You will be torn between becoming a good student if you were a bad
one at school or to continue what you did in school.
If you're a good kid then your pressure will be increased 10 folds to show
your talent and integrity to your new Professors (note: we stopped calling 'em
teachers)
You will fail badly trying to acclimatize and adapt to your new
surroundings. Your food will taste bad, you will be frustrated to meet ends,
you will miss your school friends, sometimes your school itself. A small
paranoia sets in as almost everyone who you see gives you clues and cues about
how to handle college. You will be a bit concerned about how to handle yourself
with your seniors, Professors and new friends, everyone you meet will be a
stranger. The first year quickly floats away into the past with you making new
friends, a gang, a tad more experience, fear of semester exams and a
string of hope but you're still in the Land of Nowheredom.
The Second Year or The Realization.
You've been forcefully pushed into the second year of Engineering. You
enter the college premises, slightly miffed by its intimidating aspect of
morale. You now know how the college machine works. And sadly, you're one of
the cogs in the machine. You begin to realize that you're stuck in this Machine
for another 2 and half years, which seems like a long time. Now a bit bold, you
begin to realize people who they really are. You still have problems adjusting
to college life but you know you can handle it. Your results would've been
surprising, either shockingly bad or sweetly good. You will be confused whether
to continue studying or keep depending upon lady luck.
Now, naturally your eyes begin to search for an opposite sex and eventually
you find one by the end of the year for your friends to tease you into love. It’s
up to you to choose that. Now most of your first year friendships are dissolved
and you find yourself slowly drifting towards people of your liking and where
you're liked. At this phase almost every student develops a Love/hate
relationship with the college, engineering and professors, if possible the
subjects.
By the end of the year you stand with new hangout places, newer friends,
some enmity/love, a few backlogs if that's your thing and importantly a pride
that you're an Engineer.
The Third year or The Transformation
Now all of your friends are in transition stage. Your school best friends
begin to move farther away with only a few in contact though suddenly out of
nowhere a WhatsApp group rises reminding you of your old school memories. You
begin to meet your school teachers and friends randomly on streets. Your
friendships with your not-so-close school friends begin to bloom out of nowhere.
During this year you learn some new habits which I personally forbid you from
learning, though it'd be a good experience to have it with in your limits,
don't get into trouble. The college routine is nothing new to you now and
you've adapted to the system. People know you well enough to identify you, and
identifications are by your actions and name you've gained so far. Seniors and
Professors become closer to you. You gain some fame in your department (note:
It becomes department centric once you begin to feel home) in one way or
another, be it your talent or the rumors around you. A small sense of
responsibility creeps through your childish facade. You begin to wonder but not
worry about your future, yet. Your Good/bad results begin to become the center
of your concerns. Your seniors get placed or move to their native city or go
abroad for further studies and the peer pressure begins to build up. In the
second half of third year you might probably get into a case of getting caught
for a mass bunk or some other mischief you've done with "your gang".
The sense of being an engineer fades away into the void when you get the
glimpse of the real world outside via your other college friends. You see that
they've already learnt three extracurricular courses, attended few conferences
and maybe published a paper. Facebook glorifies their sense of enjoyment and
your sense of depression, while their cultural happen for days together, yours
barely happen for hours. The paranoia comes rushing back to you. It slowly
dawns on you that the damage was already done and the flood will be soon over
your head. By the end semester you're left standing at the precipice of the
cliff holding your breath.
The Fourth Year or The Salvation.
Now you're out of the Machine, you're not bounded by the cogs, not forced by
the system, which is what makes it more dangerous for you to survive out there.
You're left in the open, left vulnerable, Left to die.
I might sound over dramatic or exaggerating but this is what it exactly feels
to be amidst a group of humans your age being better than you in talent,
intelligence and experience.
Hyper panic sets in, and your mind undergoes a psychological change which
make or break your future. The change is totally dependent upon you and your
mind. You begin to work towards that change, whatever it might be. Parents, neighbors
and relatives begin to irk you every time you see them.
But between all this there will be sudden burst of friendship between all
your friends, be it school or college, emotions begin to pour in from all
sides.
You witness some crazy stuff all over, stupid and serious ass confessions,
new relationships, new breakups and everything that squeezes you from inside.
You will go on sudden trips or tours to places and have a bucket load of fun. (Note:
do not miss this part, you'll never get it later in life)
Your exam results are the reminder of what you've done till now, they'll be
the regret or pride for you in the coming months.
You somehow finish your project and wait for the final verdict.
The professors pardon you, mostly. Your juniors might miss you, and you will
not miss your college.
It’s the reality. You haven't really missed your school for 2 years now, and
you won't miss your college that much.
The future will definitely be uncertain, you might have backlogs to complete
or jobs to hunt for or sit home waiting for the offer letter from the only
company you got miraculously placed in.
Life will become harder.
Now I, the writer of this post, is standing after previous line in life, in
reality.
If I'm still writing after four years, maybe I'll tell you what happens
after this.
To Be Continued...
That had to be said. Thank you.
~Thank you for everything.
